Robin vs. her favourite show

My favourite show on TV ended yesterday – Chuck. It was one of the best, smartest, fun shows on television. If you never watched it – it was about a nerdy guy whose life changed when he accidentally became in possession of a database of government secrets, with Zachary Levi (my future husband – he doesn’t know it), Yvonne Strahovski, and Adam Baldwin. The show was the perfect triple threat of comedy, action and heart. I just watched the series finale, and every goodbye within the show just made it more and more clear that we were saying goodbye to something great. Yeah, I cried.

To be honest, at some point I wasn’t sure if I was crying because I loved these characters and was going to miss them, if the show’s goodbyes themselves were just sad, or if I was crying because frankly, I wanted an excuse to. Maybe it was all of the above. Somewhere along the line, the “what will I watch on TV now?” question morphed into “what do I do with myself now?” I’ve been trying to push the uncertainty of what life becomes after finishing treatment for cancer to the back of my mind, and just putting one foot in front of the other. But somehow, because I am a giant nerd, I managed to find the parallels between my life and the end of a network television show. To add, the end of the show gives me one more hour in the week of time that I don’t know what to do with.

Geez. Only my mind works like that. No surprise that my favourite shows all have nerds…

In other news – I had my first post-treatment follow-up with my haematologist on Wednesday and I got a clean-ish bill of health!! My abdominal scan was clean – no intestinal issues, no enlarged lymph nodes down there. My spleen was slightly larger on this scan than on previous ones, but my doc thinks that because all my abdo scans were after I started treatment, he thinks the chemo would have been suppressing its size to begin with, and now it’s just back to normal. Physical exam was fine. Essentially, I can return to my normal routines…whatever those were…until April when I get the final word on my cancer status. Whoo-hoo!!

So I somehow managed to fill Friday with things I couldn’t/shouldn’t do when I was in treatment:
– I took public transit all the way downtown without fearing for my life.
– I had SUSHI – my God, I missed sushi…
– I had a green apple cooler. I didn’t really miss alcohol, but it’s nice to have that option!
– I sang with my friends, for the first time in months, at karaoke. There was a time there when I was really scared that I wouldn’t have gotten my voice back, and I would cringe at my utter failure to carry a tune. But slowly and surely, it’s getting back to normal.

Okay, must get back to grieving over my show. Goodbye, Chuck…